Finding a happy medium
I think that’s what motherhood is mostly about. Not everything can go your way. Not everything can go the child’s way. It’s finding that happy medium that makes life easier, manageable.
I’ve always subscribed to the “pick your battles” philosophy of parenting. You simply cannot exert your will over a child 24/7 and expect to have him grow up to be someone you’d want to talk to on the bus. So there’s been times when I’ve looked the other way when one of my kids wanted to do something that, while wasn’t dangerous or stupid, may not be what *my* mother would have allowed. Things like bedtimes, which aren’t a real strict thing around here mostly because of the homeschooling aspect. Things like having cereal with no milk because right now, she simply doesn’t like it that way. It’s no big deal. Go for it! Things like baths – my kids simply don’t need nightly baths, at least not in the winter. No big deal!
I also expect my children to make their own decisions about things. My son *HATES* brushing his teeth. HATES it. Well, that’s fine – don’t brush your teeth… but do NOT come crying to me when they start to hurt. Do NOT come crying to me when the dentist tells you that you have 4 cavities, and he’ll have to fix them. He decides to brush his teeth.
He has a friend with … less than stellar personal hygiene habits, and the other kids make fun of him. My son wonders out loud if he should stop being friends with him because of the other kids. I leave the decision up to him, but ask him… what if it were you, and they made fun of you because you have brown hair, or because of your teeth (his adult teeth have all come in a bizarre shade of YELLOW, and no one can tell me why). He makes his own decisions.
By all accounts, my 2 oldest children are happy, friendly, respectful children. Ok, the 3 yr old needs work, but SHE IS 3. I am complimented all the time on how well behaved they are when we’re in public, and this gives me a great sense of accomplishment. I think that motherhood is all about finding those happy mediums.
So now, I have another one to find happy mediums with. Little Mr. Zachary & I have found a happy medium in nursing. He doesn’t stay up nursing for an hour at a time at 2am, and I’m not a raving lunatic the next day. See, isn’t that a happy medium??
Ahhhh, I see. You’ve struck a deal with the little one. Wise mama.
ThI can’t believe he is 1-month old already. (I know, you’re balking at the “already”)…
I can’t believe it either, really. 2 weeks ago, it felt like it’d take forever just to get to the next day. Now he’s already an old man!